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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| Oddwich - (noun) A sandwich made from things you wouldn't normally make a sandwich from.
Usage: "What a delicious oddwich." "It looks like we've only got oddwich makin's in the fridge, man."
Can be found wherever men live.
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| I've been up since 7 in the ay-em, despite only being down at two-ish earlier in this ay-em. So, brain mush for you.
How nice of you to ask! Well, I'm going to go put on some...things....and head downtown to pay some schmuck for breakfast and coffee! Then I'm going to think about the people I met on the road and how much I miss them. I'm going to marvel at how such a short time can have such a huge impact, and how people I've only just begun to know can love on me like they do, or did, or both. I'm also going to ponder how I'm going to plug myself into this .....thing. Industry, college, etc. What am I going to do?
Praise God for coffee and go to mass, thats what.
I still have time to dream.
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Edit for monday, May 25:
The problem with pockets is wanting things to put in them.
The problem with nice weather is wanting to leave.
The problem with flowcharts is wanting the rest of life to work like that.
Edit for later, monday may 25:
The problem with problems is wanting to fix the whole world.
The problem with problems is problems in your problems so you can problem solve while you problem solve. Damn.
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| In all of the broken places.
Its not really an option for some of us.
I must rest in Jesus. This is much, much easier understood than practiced.
Can I write something beautiful? Something to play adagio on heartstrings? A sound so soft eyes would kill for ears, and the way you'd look would lay the world low. The sight so catching your body could only wait in jealous anxiety for a breath's caress. Truth in it apparent and striking, it is eternal and everlasting, and will lie in opposition to the world and her ever changing desire.
I would like to write something that catches your eye and warrants a sharply drawn breath and slightly elevated heartbeat.
I would like to write something that says I love you.
What do I know of love? I can barely manage to love myself for a whole eight hours, how can I throw these words around? Who am I, a failure, to declare love? If I have not yet accepted the full love of the Father for His child, a sinner, how can I hope to share it with my neighbor? I can, because I intend. I am a broken man under grace. I declare my intent, regardless of obstacle, and pray for wisdom, understanding, faith, hope, love, and grace above all things to accept the love and gifts from my Father in heaven. I have given considerable time and thought to my intent, and will continue to do so and also to pray for guidance, clarity and boldness in its fulfillment.
I must rest in Jesus.
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| I really miss my freedom.
To be honest I feel like I'm a slave to things that are not Christ. I tell myself I'm a dedicated christian that studies and prays and reads on his own....but I'm really not. Those things I don't pursue because I want to, but because I know I should. I dont want to read my bible today, so instead of reading to read I set myself up to need to, or to have to, and so I can tell myself later I've done what a good boy should. So I can sleep. Bad sleep, even. I go deeper and find dry study! I press in further and come away wanting, sometimes with less. This isnt how things should be! NO!
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I want to be known. I miss it terribly. I miss letting myself miss it.
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Tonight the weather is perfect for leaving. My heart is nearly ready I think (in my foolishness), to just flee into the warm night with nothing.
I'm breaking down tonight and crying. For my lovers on the road, for my Jesus, for my hiding and running and denial and lying and hatred and selfishness, for my comforter and helper and other half, for that enormous hole I carry with me, for trying so hard sometimes to be hopeful and consistent but always (always) failing
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Your Will be done though, for whatever reason I choose to say it now
Be faithful to meet my needs to carry out Your Will
and I will always be Yours.
I dont want these words to be empty.
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| Gloria Patri, et Filio, et Spiritui Sancto, Sicut erat in principio, et nunc, et semper, et in saecula saeculorum. Amen. ~~~~ Roughly: Glory be to the Father, and to the Son and to the Holy Ghost/Spirit, As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.~~~ Also: I am alive. | | |
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